Rollercoaster-Ridin' with My Hubby

when life throws you one too many hard balls, you may very well just give up hoping.

but somehow, just when you're about to let up, something swoops by to bring you back up into the clouds for a while.

i told snuffy hubby our journey leading up to the wedding day is like a rollercoaster ride.

and he knows how much i hate rollercoasters.

things that didn't seem like options a month ago (which had caused me a whole lotta distress and tears), now are.

but these don't come easy, and without tears.

i had a huge bawl last night after dinner at hubby's.

it was cathartic but i don't think the session's quite done yet.

many times today, i felt the urge to cry but couldn't since i was in more than snuffy hubby's company.

it sure doesn't help when you've got a running nose, sore throat and related breathing difficulties to contend with.

we saw a condo at a fantastic location this afternoon.

unfortunately though, everything within our price range was already taken and all that's left is something we'd have to struggle to own.

so after a whole afternoon and night of summing, i told snuffy hubby we should just let it go and not even consider it as an option.

it'd be too hard for us to enjoy our newly-wedded lives if we had to get by on minimum disposable income.

i think he was trying to make it happen because of me.

and i just can't help wondering what i ever did to deserve someone so wonderful in my life.

whenever i think of how eric showed up, i just can't help but cry my eyes out.

i'm still in awe of how we came to be, even just four months before our big day.

i cry in his arms when i'm upset.

i cry alone when i feel overwhelmed by his love and care.

he knew how helpful it'd be for me if we could afford that place because of the NEL, proximity of amenities and family.

but i suggested that this might very well be like the time we searched for our wedding venue.

in the end, we didn't choose the beaufort and instead got something else which will present a unique experience to everyone attending.

so now, while it seems like we're giving up the perfect nest, i'm pretty certain we'll find something we can both be proud of in due time.

i just hope we won't be put through too many of these rides in the future.

because i'm pretty certain my health won't let me survive too many of those. =(